First dates and how not to completely blow it

First dates are a pretty nerve-wracking experience. Whether you are looking for a life partner or just a regular FB, both parties are always trying to present their best side to make themselves seem like the Catch Of The Century and increase the chances of either a second date or some horizontal hanky panky action later on that night.

However there are some risks involved in that first encounter. At best, you have a decent conversation and a rather enjoyable time together but they’re not exactly what you’re looking for, so you’ve forgone a couple of hours and $50 (it could be more or less, depending on her taste for expensive bars or whether chivalry is still alive and kicking and he offers to pay the bill). At worst, you meet some batshit crazy nut job and wish you could shoot up with heroin on the spot to make the pain go away*.

Couple dating

Unfortunately I can’t give any reliable advice that will minimise the chance of meeting the whackos (unless of course, you actually want to meet the crazy ones because you love the drama), however here are some very general tips that you may want to bear in mind if you think that you would like to see that charming lass or lad again.

Hide the crazy

Believe it or not, your date doesn’t need (nor want) to know about your collection of 79 stuffed squirrels, that you once jacked yourself up with cocaine, ecstasy and acid for 3 consecutive days and were hospitalised, or that you have planned every aspect of your wedding day right down to the colour of the petals that the flower girl will be sprinkling before you walk down the aisle. Really. Keep the conversation light and amusing, stick to safe topics like travel or favourite movies, and take the cue from them – if they start venturing to weird-ass territory and show a little bit of their crazy, only then you may want to test how elastic that boundary could be.

Rein in the swearing

You may think that describing the restaurant as f***ing sh** is quite apt after a flavourless and sub-standard meal, or referring to your ex-girlfriend as a sl** and a c**t is just calling spade a spade, and hey, depending on your date they may be as liberal as you are with the use of expletives. However, freely swearing on a first date like a sweaty, bogan construction worker** is unattractive and gives the impression that you have the extremely limited vocabulary of a sweaty, bogan construction worker. Not cool.

Don’t drone on about your exes

Noone wants to be with someone that is still hung up on their ex or living in the past, so don’t give that impression. It’s just simply unnecessary to mention that you once went backpacking with your ex through Vietnam, or that you and your ex used to love that little Thai restaurant around the corner from your flat. Just tell them that you loved backpacking through Vietnam and that Thai restaurant does the best jungle curry. That. Is. All. And god forbid, do NOT cry and tell your date that your ex was the love of your life. No good can possibly can come of that.

Of course there are many more pearls of wisdom when it comes to dating, but if you avoid these sure-fire passion-killers on the first date, I’m sure that you will markedly improve your chance of scoring a second date – one step closer to true love!

Have you had any horror first dates? What are your first date tips?

* Laugh Lots, Travel Often does not necessarily endorse drug use
** No offence to bogan construction workers intended

* Image courtesy of stock.xchange

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2 thoughts on “First dates and how not to completely blow it

  1. Pingback: Money can buy you happiness (and shiny material possessions) | Laugh Lots, Travel Often

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