As a singleton, you receive quite a bit of sympathy and advice, almost always unsolicited and unwanted. Family gatherings or dinners with friends in particular can suck the joy out of life – “oh, you’ll find someone someday”, “maybe you’re too picky?”, “have you tried internet dating? I’ve heard it’s the new thing”…
If only those smug, married couples knew what they were missing out on! Or perhaps they do know but are too afraid to let slip to their partner or their friends that they, on occasion, pine for their single and carefree days. Because the truth of it is that, a lot of the time, living the single life is pretty damn good. While coupled up friends are dealing with nagging partners and whiny kids, a singleton doesn’t have to answer to anyone. Noone!
The reason that the single life is so charmed is that the dreaded “C” word just doesn’t exist. That’s right, you can live your life however you damn well please.
One area that seems to cause the greatest conflict between couples is the freedom to party with whomever you like, as often as you like. One half is usually moaning that the other half goes out too much, doesn’t bother calling home if they’re going to be home late (or not at all), or hangs out with assholes. Singletons have no such dramas, being able to booze up all night without the need to pussyfoot around, telling lies to someone at home. You could go out every night of the week if you chose to, as long as you could manage to present yourself at work in a semi-functional state the next morning. And you could hang out with your ex if you wanted, without someone being insanely jealous and giving you the silent treatment for the next week.
Another area that causes issues, and is probably one of the main reasons that couples split up, is money. There’s always one person that spends too much, inevitably on the wrong things – expensive shoes and clothes or too many gadgets, or even worse, drinking too much or blowing their pay on gambling. When you’re single, you don’t have to justify what you’re spending YOUR OWN money on. If you want to blow all your cash on your collection of miniature replica World War II planes or on expensive scuba diving gear, then you can.
And these two are just the tip of the iceberg. Other benefits of being single include being able to leave your house in a state of disarray if you want without having someone nagging you about it, waking up at whatever time you choose, not having to compromise on where you want to want to live (you want to live near the beach, she wants to live near her parents), being able to have sex with whomever you please (as long as they want to have sex with you!), watching whatever television channel you want (hello, 24 hour sport channels), and not needing to go through the pain of Brazilian/back, sack and crack waxes.
So at your next family gathering or dinner party with friends when the whole table is interrogating you on the status of your love life and reminding you that your eggs are shrivelling up faster than Tony Abbott’s credibility, throw in some stories of amazing travels or hot sex with strangers, or show off the new shiny iPad that you just bought. They’ll swallow their sympathy and wish they could leave their ball and chain at home and come partying with you for once.