List love: things to be thankful for

I adore the idea of Thanksgiving. I’ve never been fortunate enough to celebrate one, but I think the concept poops all over Christmas. Your family comes together, and you celebrate all the things you should be thankful for. How is that not a million times better than a day that has turned into a display of gross consumerism where you’re almost definitely going to get a dodgy present you don’t want?

I’ll be honest though, Christmas ain’t bad. Which means Thanksgiving must be incredible.

In honour of Thanksgiving this week, here’s my list of the top five things to be thankful for.

5. Crisps

If I need to convince you that crisps are actually known as the “food of the Gods”, you’re not eating them right. I suggest you try them as follows: as a lunch supplement to chase away the bitter disappointment of your lackluster sandwich; at home with a glass of wine, dunked in whatever dip takes your fancy; at the pub straight off the ripped packet with friends on your third beer; and while you wait at your parents place while the sizzle of BBQ meat fills the air. If you’re still unconvinced…well, there’s no hope for you.

4. Ryan Gosling

Recently cheated of his rightful place as the world’s hottest man, you don’t need to look any further for all of your eye candy needs than at this.

And this.

And this.

Oh. My. Word.

3. Birth control

Let’s just say it keeps things under control and slightly less regretful when women the world over look at pictures like this and can’t quite manage to get their urges under control. I should probably also mention that it allows millions of people the freedom to choose when to start a family, or whether to start a family at all. And having choice is something we can all be very thankful for.

2. Ear plugs

Sleep is not a distant dream when you’re living with a snorer, across the street from a party raging on at 4am, next door to a loud TV watcher, on the plane with a screaming baby, or across the hallway from your flatmate making full use of her birth control.

1. Holidays

Americans may have it right when it comes to Thanksgiving, but there’s one thing they definitely aren’t making the most of: holidays. With only around 10 days of annual leave a year; our poor cousins in the good old USA really have to be thankful for every day off. But I can assure you that it never matters how many days of holidays I have, I’m thankful for every single one. Diving in the Red Sea, shopping up a storm in New York, eating my way through Kuala Lumpur, or simply exploring the slightly closer British coastline – every moment spent soaking up a different place and meeting different people reminds me of all the things I should be thankful for, and how lucky I really am.

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