There are many who argue that sexuality is not a choice… but if it was, there are some moments in life when straight ladies would choose to be dating another woman! Here’s a tongue-in-cheek look at a couple of them, making full use of some good ol’ stereotypes… with no offense intended to the men-folk of the world!
5. Inappropriate bodily functions
You’re sharing a romantic bath with your partner. There are candles and bubble bath and music playing softly in the background. Suddenly the romance of the moment is shattered by the sound of a loud explosion… and it’s not construction work on a nearby building. Enough said.
3. Wardrobe x2
You’re having one of those days when nothing in your wardrobe pleases you. There seems to be so much in there… but you’ve worn it all before and none of it feels right for today. Imagine if your wardrobe was doubled!!! Clothes, shoes, make-up, perfume. Without paying a cent! Brilliant.
There’s a problem swirling round and round in your head but you don’t know exactly how you feel about it. Maybe sad. Maybe angry. So you vocalise your thoughts to your partner. As the words come tumbling out of your mouth, you realise that you’re really upset. The tears start streaming down your face. Your other half looks at you with bewilderment and says “Oh, that’s easy to fix. All you need to do is “x, y, z”.” No!!! We don’t want a solution! We want a big cuddle, full of empathy, and a gently supportive “Oh, honey, I know it’s hard now but it will get better”. In short, we want a woman.
2. Girly talk
Have you ever been talking like crazy over lunch with your girlfriends, sharing all your emotions with compassion and warmth… then come home to the other half who is sitting on the couch absorbed in the football, not the slightest bit interested in what you might want to tell him about your day? Imagine instead going home to a hot cuppa and more girly chat about your girly chat whilst cuddled up on the couch, your guilty pleasure Robbie playing softly in the background, and not a whistle to be heard. Heaven?
1. The toilet seat
You walk into the bathroom and the toilet seat is up. Yet again. Is there anything more frustrating? I know we’ve been over this a millions times, but seriously men, this drives us nuts! And we’re getting sick of having to tell you. If you want to prevent a mass-walk-out-in-favour-of-the-fairer-sex, start putting the toilet seat down!!!