How not to use Facebook

You know how I feel about over-sharers I don’t know, right?

Well it’s come to my attention recently that over-sharers who I do know can be even worse. And it all seems to happen on facebook (assuming you know everyone you’re friends with of course).

Sure, you can tell me to buzz off – that if I don’t want to see people over-sharing that I should just “de-friend” those people. But it’s kind of tricky if the over-sharer is someone you actually see in real life. Awkward.

But as long as you don’t do the following, I’m sure we’ll all get along:

1. Don’t air your dirty laundry

No one needs to know if you’ve fallen out with your girlfriend, best friend, brother or boss. Don’t rant about them, don’t have arguments with them on your wall for everyone to see, and for heaven’s sake – don’t accuse them of something without proof. Nobody likes having people argue in front of them in real life, so no one is going to think you’re clever for doing it online. Plus who wants to show up at their next get together knowing that everyone thinks the girlfriend they still have in tow has been playing them like a fool? Keep it on the down low and nobody is going to judge you (or her).

have-a-mature-conversation-nah-id-rather-make-an-angry-facebook-status-about-it

2. Don’t tag me if it’s not me

There’s only two reasons why you should tag someone: (a) it’s actually them in the photo or status, or (b) it relates to something extremely important and relevant to them i.e. you are thanking them for the amazing technicolour dreamcoat they gifted you. Let me assure you that if I want to see pictures of you eating a sandwich, standing in the garden, or walking your dog, I will go onto your page and look at them. You do not need to tag me and ten thousand other people to ensure that we look at your photo that has nothing to do with me. Seriously. You really don’t.

3. Don’t approve of cruelty

Listen, it’s like this: if you “like” a status that is slating someone you don’t know – that’s not cool. If you “like” something that is clearly cruel, rude, or abusive – that’s very not cool. No matter who it’s aimed at (clearly proven evil historical megalomaniacs excepted). Unfortunately this shows me way too much about your character. And it’s not pretty.

Three simple things. And we’ll all just get along fiiiiiiine.

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11 thoughts on “How not to use Facebook

  1. Great post. My two Facebook bugbears are PDA’s (‘Happy anniversary to my darling hubby, I love you so much and can’t believe I get to spend the rest of my life with you’ *pukes*) and attention seeking indirects (‘How is it that the people you love the most are the ones who can hurt you the most’).

  2. Maybe it’s my fault for seeing Facebook as a news service, but I also get annoyed by posts that don’t tell the whole story.

    “32 days to go!” >> to what? your next holiday? major heart surgery? If you’ve got more than 10 friends they’re probably not all up to the minute on what’s happening in your life. Throw us a bone here and finish that sentence.

    “Sometimes life can be so cruel :(” >> please please please let some else have already been guilted into commenting “oh no, what’s wrong?” and you to have replied so I’m not left imaging your whole family has been massacred.

  3. Maybe it’s my fault for seeing Facebook as a news service, but I also get annoyed by posts that don’t tell the whole story.

    “32 days to go!” >> to what? your next holiday? major heart surgery? If you’ve got more than 10 friends they’re probably not all up to the minute on what’s happening in your life. Throw us a bone here and finish that sentence.

    “Sometimes life can be so cruel 😦 ” >> please please please let some else have already been guilted into commenting “oh no, what’s wrong?” and you to have replied so I’m not left imaging your whole family has been massacred.

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